


Undefined

by orphan_account



Category: Bangtan Boys, Kpop - Fandom, bts
Genre: Angst, Depression, Insecurity, Lonliness, Sad, Unrequited Love, Unreturned Feelings, Yoongi is hella sensative, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-07-28 20:06:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7654870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, Yoongi takes the group's criticism to heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Undefined

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this and I cried the whole time but I didn't proof read it so good luck

정의되지 않은

Sensitivity was not one of Min-Yoongi's best traits. Though it helped him with countless numbers of partners who 'loved a guy in touch with his feelings,' it did not help him at all when it came to his group of friends.

You see, the guys were quite reckless. They didn't think before they spoke, their words sometimes leaving a dull ache in Yoongi's heart.

The silverette was fragile. It's take him a long time to overcome the feeling that their sometimes harsh blows at him left behind. But they came fast and endlessly and just piled up inside. He tended to bottle up his feelings inside, too scared of being more of a burden then he already was...

It started on Monday, at dance practice.

Yoongi had been slacking off, purely just because he hadn't been feelings well lately. Namjoon was not happy with what little effort Yoongi had been putting in lately. Just... He wasn't trying at all, and Namjoon was fed up with it.

He'd yelled. A lot.

"If you aren't going to fucking try, then just go back to the dorms alright?! We're all trying our best here and just because you're bored or whatever doesn't give you the right to mess up the whole routine, got it? You don't run shit around here." He'd snapped, beady eyes boring into Yoongi's soul.

He'd felt is heart snap a bit at the harsh words, his will to not cry in front of the others almost dropping. He was their HYUNG, he couldn't be weak! Especially not in front of Jimin.

Oh, Jimin. The peach haired sunshine with a smile that lit up Yoongi's very being. The very much straight peach haired sunshine. The very much straight peach haired sunshine who was seeing a woman with long dark hair and legs that never ended, somethings Yoongi would never have.

So, on account of the other members being very upset with his behavior, Yoongi nodded and gathered his stuff before he was heading home without a word.

The others were used to Yoongi going silent after their quips. They just figured he was going to pout and mope a bit before he got over it. He was too much of a baby, and it annoyed him. He needed to get over himself.

They didn't understand how much they were hurting the rapper.

Then, on Wednesday, Yoongi had been especially clingy to Jimin. He didn't know why, but he'd spent the whole day following him like a lost puppy.

"Bug off, man." He'd been told.

And that's exactly what he did.

Yoongi didn't show up for dinner for a third time that week, and the others were baffled. He'd barely left his room, and when he did, it was to use the restroom, go visit Jimin, get told off for visiting Jimin, then back into his hide away he went. No amount of coaxing could get him to come out.

Jungkook, the sweet maknae, tried desperately to get his Hyung to come out and talk to him. Jungkook was the only one who wouldn't be quite so mean to him. He'd stand up for him if the others said something way out of line, but if he agreed, he'd stay silent.

That's what pained Yoongi the most.

Did Jungkook really believe Yoongi was ruining everything? Is that the way he truly felt?

With a grunt, Yoongi declined Jungkook's offer of leaving and locked his door again.

On Thursday, the group decided to have an intervention. They all went up to his door and barged in. They found him in a pair of boxers laying top of his bed, his eyes hooded and his form curled around himself as if in pain. He was skinnier and pale, his hair shaggy and unkempt. His eyes had purplish bags under them, and he squirmed as if he was terribly uncomfortable.

But the boys failed to notice his flaws, instead telling him he needed to 'Man up, and come out.'

'If you can't handle constructive criticism, maybe stardom isn't where you should be?'

'We're tired of babying you.'

'You're an adult, act like it.'

It was only Kookie who took in how much he'd changed over the week, and covered his mouth in horror. What had happened to his squishy, beaming hyung?

"Stop it!" Jungkook had begged the boys as they shot at him relentlessly. "Stop it, YOU'RE HURTING HIM."

Everyone fell silent and a daze fell over the crowd.

Is this what it was about? Was Yoongi, cold, Heartless Yoongi actually affected by what they had to say.

First it dawned on Namjoon. What he had said to him. How the hurt flashed in his eyes. How has he have been so stupid as not to see it? He knew that look, that was the distasteful look he wore when Taehyung pointed out he was 'gaining weight' a month back, or when Jin pointed out his dancing 'wasn't as good as it used to be.'

That was the look he wore when the men he considered his brothers treated him as nothing more than a piece of trash.

It was Namjoon who's eyes widened in a sense of shock and guilt when the first stray tear ran down Yoongi's cheek. It was first Namjoon who lost his cool.

It was then Hobi who's mouth fell open slightly when the boy's hand's flew to his mouth in an attempt to mute the sob that was finding its way out of his lips.

It was Taehyung who's eyes went shallow as those tears began to fall as he realized he was one of the reasons Yoongi was so frail, so small now.

It was Jin who's chest swelled up in a sense of remorse as he realized he had failed at his job of keeping all the members safe and happy.

It was Jimin who was at a loss for words when he realized that Yoongi had needed him all along, and he dismissed him as being clingy and rude. He couldn't find the right words to apologize.

It was Jungkook who realized the group's 'constructive criticism' was actually 'bullying and torment of the people who love you', and it was Jungkook who realized that Yoongi had fallen apart in front of him and he'd done nothing to stop it.

As they all stood there and stared, Yoongi's head ever so slowly lolled up so he was facing them directly, the glistening tears in his chocolate brown eyes unmissable as he spoke in a hoarse voice.

"All of your feelings toward me have gone on undefined for far too long. If you want me to leave, I will. I can have my stuff out by tomorrow. I'm sorry for pulling down the group for so long."

It all clicked, everything made sense.

Everything was a blur from there, a mixture of yells from everyone blaming each other, a sobbing Jungkook at his feet apologizing. Yoongi felt light-headed, he felt purely numb.

He fell back on the bed, blank eyes staring up at the ceiling.

"I'm sorry for being this way."

**Author's Note:**

> I listened to Butterfly when I wrote this what's wrong with me


End file.
